How do I postpone my wedding?
Firstly, know that it’s ok to be heartbroken. Know that it’s ok to cry. Know that you’re not alone.
You’ve just spent every waking moment for the past however many weeks, months even years (and likely every unconscious moment also), living and breathing weddings. Your wedding planning has taken over your life until this point and now you may have to postpone it?
You know it’s the most responsible thing to do but that doesn’t make it any easier to accept. It doesn’t make it any easier to pick up the phone and start. How are you even supposed to start? Covid-19 itself is overwhelming enough but when you throw in postponing your wedding, it’s easy to feel frazzled to say the least! Well… if you’ve read any of my other blogs you will know that one of the simplest ways to organise your thoughts (not specific to wedding planning) is to make a list. So, this is what I advise; make a list and put it next to your glass of wine while you tick off each item.
First, if you have wedding insurance then you need to check it and contact your insurance company, so you know what your options are. They will be able to explain each step for you and help you along the way with any queries you have.
Second, contact your venue and have the discussion with them. As of Monday 24th March, venues have been told to close so your wedding planner is very likely working from home now. Don’t worry if you cannot reach them by phone, they should be at the other end of an email. Your venue will be able to talk you through the options and most are being very understanding regarding the circumstances so are happy to reschedule the date for you and transfer your deposit at no extra cost. Before committing to the new date fully, you will need to speak with your church/registrar and make sure they are also free on that date. They are currently prioritising immediate weddings so don’t worry if you cannot reach them straight away – just keep your venue in the loop as to what is going on and they will understand and work with you to make this as stress free as they possibly can.
Third, speak to your suppliers. Best case scenario, they are all available on the new date and are happy to move. However, please be prepared to lose some of them. Depending how in-demand they are and the new date you wish to move to, there may be some suppliers who aren’t available. Some may be small businesses who cannot afford to give you your deposit back and while they will try their best (because let’s face it, these circumstances are strange and unpredictable for us all) you have agreed to certain terms and conditions and they may not be able to return your deposit. The majority are being incredibly understanding and doing everything they can to move the date but not everybody has this ability unfortunately.
Once the new date is on hold with your suppliers, it’s time to contact your guests. First and foremost, contact your closest family members to make sure that the new date works for them. Try to prioritise anybody who is travelling either long distance across the country or from another country altogether as they will need to reschedule travel plans. Your guests will also need to think about accommodation. If your venue has accommodation on-site, they may change the rooms for you (always worth an ask!) but they may require guests to contact then and amend their bookings individually. For any bookings made directly with the venue this should be straight forward enough. For any guests who have booked via an online travel agent, they will need to amend via the same online travel agent. For any guests who have pre-paid, they may lose their payment but again, there is no harm in calling and asking due to the unique circumstances.
Once these main elements have been changed, the rest should fall into place. Remember, you’ve done most of the work already!
I’m going to say it again because it is so important – please remember that you are not alone in this. There are thousands of couples who are going through the same heartache of postponing their wedding day and I can promise that everybody in the industry will be doing everything in their power to make this as easy as possible as we can for you. When you’re in the wedding business, you’re in it because you love it. That’s why you booked us, right? So, trust in us when we say that we will take care of you. We are all in this boat together and we will get through this ocean of uncertainty.
When your original date comes along, try to embrace it and even celebrate it if you can – don’t mourn it. There is quite literally nothing that any of us can do about it so keep calm and carry on, as they say, because at the end of the day, you are marrying the person you love and with whom you are going to spend the rest of your life and that really is all that matters.